News And Politics jokes

One day, the Pope is visiting America and driving around Washington in his limo when he gets an idea.
"Driver? Can I drive for a while?"
"Sure," says the driver. How can you say no to the Pope? So the Pope takes the wheel and starts driving like a maniac all around Washington -- dodging in and out of traffic, going eighty, cutting people off. Soon, a cop pulls him over. But when the Pope rolls down the window, the cop stops dead in his tracks, and goes back to the car.
"We got somebody really important here," he says to his partner.
"Who is it? Is it a senator?"
"No. More important."
"The president?"
"No. More important."
"An ambassador? Who?"
"I don't know. But the Pope is his driver."

George Bush is so dumb he thinks the Joint Chiefs of Staff are a bunch of indians who roll extra fat doobies.

Gary Condit was on a sinking ship and everyone was rushing to get into the lifeboats. The captain yelled, "Woman and children first!"

"Screw the Woman!" One man yelled.

"Do we have time?" said Mr. Condit.

Why has the Enron scandal been so hard on ESL teachers?

Because they now have to explain to their students why "to LAY" is worse than "to F*CK"!