News And Politics jokes

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half bush
 
 
Bush's mother prayed fervently that GW would grow up and be president. So far, half of her prayer has been answered.
clinton's finished now
 
 
Q: How do you know Bill Clinton is done having sex?

A: You have to wipe the Whitewater off your dress...
inoffensive nicknames for breasts
 
 

1) Chest Trays

2) NFRU (Not for Recreational Use)

3) Pastor Baiters

4) Mounds of Shame

5) Heavenly Canteens

6) Pearly Weights

7) Hooteronomies

8) Pizza Pizza

9) Sweater Undulations

10) The Daughters of Lactiticus

11) Racks of Lambs of God

12) Communion Woofers

13) First and Second Mammalonians

14) Pamela's Burdens

15) Beelzeboobs

heaven's shining waters
 
 
George W. Bush, Clinton, and Gore were all in heaven, and the angel said, "You must cross this river and we will judge how much you have sinned based on how far you sink."

Dubya goes first and gets up to his neck, but makes it across. He looks back and sees Al Gore walking on the water. He appeals to the angel saying, "He's sinned as much as I have, what gives?"

The angel says, "He's standing on Clinton's shoulders!"


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