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concorde humor 2
 
 
'What are you doing tonight?' asked the Air France co-pilot of the pilot. 'You coming out for drinks?'

'No, I'm just going to crash at the hotel.'

dear old dad
 
 
Q: What did Saddam Hussein have in common with his father?

A: Neither knew when to pull out!

top ten perks of being saddam hussein's stepson
 
 
10. For your birthday, you get the head of an infidel
9. People never refer to you as "The crazy one in the family"
8. On weekends, you get to bring home weapons of mass destruction
7. Don't want to clean your room? Threaten to tell the United States dad's exact location
6. Play your cards right and in 10 years you'll be torturing the Iraqi people
5. Unique chance to observe a tyrannical madman up close
4. Big inheritance when U.S. troops finally kill your stepfather
3. Father-son bonding over 3am prank calls to U.N. weapons inspectors
2. You can get first pick of the police auction's seized and repossessed camels
1. Get to call Bin Laden "Uncle Osama"
pre-nuptial agreements
 
 
A secretary for a foreign embassy was entertaining a wealthy foreign ambassador during lunch at a very expensive restaurant in New York.

The ambassador was so enthralled by the beauty and presence of this secretary that he asked her to marry him. The secretary was startled, but remembered that her boss told her never to insult foreign dignitaries, so she decided to let him down easy.

"I'll only marry you under three conditions."

"Anything, anything," said the ambassador.

"First, you must buy me a 14-karat gold wedding band with a 72 carat diamond, along with a 28-inch studded matching necklace for our engagement."

Without hesitation, the ambassador picked up his cellular phone, called his personal accountant, told him the instructions, and said, "Yes, yes, I buy, I buy!"

The secretary thought that her first request was too easy, so she thought of a more difficult situation.

"Second, I want you to build me a 58-acre mansion in the richest part of the Hamptons along with a 40-acre summer home in the sweetest vineyards of France."

The ambassador picked up his phone, called his personal broker in New York, then called another broker in France, and after his quick conversation, he said, "Yes, yes, I build, I build!"

The secretary was very startled, and knew she must think of a final request that would be impossible to live up to.

"Finally," she said. "I'll only marry you if you have a 10-inch penis."

A sad face befell the ambassador, and he cupped his face in his hands. After weeping in his native language for a few minutes, the ambassador slowly lifted his head and said, "Ok, ok, I cut, I cut!"


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