Gross jokes

What's black, white, red all over, and doesn't fit through revolving doors?

A nun with a spear through her head.

What's green and red, and goes 100 mph?

A frog in a blender!

A man went to a cafe and ordered some soup. Half way through, he dropped his spoon .When the waiter came around to see if everything was ok, the man told him he needed a new spoon. So the waiter pulled one out if his pouch. The man asked, "I was just wondering, why do you keep spoons in your pouch?"

The waiter answered, "To save time."

So the man went on eating his soup. After about 15 minutes, the waiter came by to see if everything was ok. The man said everything was delicious. He noticed that a string was hanging out of the waiters pants, so he asked, "I was just wondering, why do you have a string hanging out of your zipper?"

The waiter answered, "It saves time so that we don't have to wash our hands."

Then the man asked, "But don't you have to touch the doorknob to the bathroom?"
The waiter said, "I dont know about the other guys, but I just use the spoon ."

Q: What do puppies and gynecologists have in common?

A: Wet noses.