switch!
Susan was standing on a street corner when Bob stopped and said, 'Hey Susan, er, did you know you have a tampon hanging out of your mouth?'
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'Oh my God,' she said, 'what did I do with my cigarette?'
dolly's kids
How can you pick out Dolly Parton's kids on the play ground?
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They're the ones with the stretch marks around their lips!
a man with a pegleg, hook hand and...
A man with a pegleg, hook hand and an eyepatch went to apply to be a pirate.
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Interviewer: How did you get that pegleg?
Pirate: Arrr. I got me leg shot off during the first world war.
Interviewer: How did you get that hook?
Pirate: I got me hand cut off by a big knife.
Interviewer: What about your eyepatch?
Pirate: It was a rainy afternoon and I looked up into the sky and a bird crapped in me eye.
Interviewer: And that put your eye out?
Pirate: No, it was the day after I got me hook.
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