Gross jokes

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straight leper flush
 
 
Did you hear about the leper poker game?

One guy threw in his hand and the other three laughed their heads off.

the wonderful thing about tiggers
 
 
Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends?
A: He plays with Pooh
a leprechaun and his bodily fluids
 
 
One day a man walked in a bar with a box. He sat down, opened the box and out popped a leprechaun. The man told the bartender, "I want a pint of beer and a shot of whiskey for my buddy here."

There was man sitting at the end of the bar watching all of this and, after the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he ran down to the end of the bar and spit in the guy's face. Then he ran back.

The guy with the box said, "I'll have another beer and a shot of whiskey for my buddy here."

After the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he again ran to the end of the bar and spit in the man's face, then dashed back.

The guy with the box ordered another beer for himself and another shot for the leprechaun. Again, the after the leprechaun drank his shot of whiskey, he ran down to the end of the bar. But this time the man was waiting for him and he grabbed the leprechaun and held him in the air.

He said, "If you spit in my face again, I'm going to cut your pecker off."

The leprechaun laughed and said, "Leprechauns don't have peckers."

Then the man said, "If you don't have peckers, then how do you pee?"

"By spitting," said the leprechaun.

hot lunch
 
 
There were two bums walkin down a road. They both had not eaten in days, and were starving.
As they were walking, they come across a dead dog. One ran to it and scarffed it down, while the other just watched.
After the bum ate the dog, they kept walking. The now full bum asked the other, "How come you didn't fight me for the dog?

He answered, "No reason." So they keep walking.

All of a sudden the bum who ate the dog threw up. The other bum smiled in delight and said, "See, that's what I've been waiting for! A HOT meal!


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