spermally speaking
"Man," said one sperm. "When are we going to get to the fallopian tubes?"
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"You idiot," said the other. "We haven't even left the stomach yet."
things just fallin' off
This morning as I was buttoning my shirt, a button fell off. After that, I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. Then I went to open the door, and the doorknob fell off. I went to get into my car, and the door handle came off in my hand. Now I'm afraid to pee.
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trapped inside a whale
What do you if you're trapped inside a whale?
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Run 'round and 'round till you're all pooped out!
blind skydivers
Do you know why blind people don't skydive?
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It scares the crap out of their seeing-eye-dogs.
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