vampires in a bar
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, 'I'll have a pint of blood.'
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The second one says, 'I'll have one, too.'
The third one says, 'I'll have a pint of plasma.'
The bartender says, 'So, that'll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?'
pickle slicer
One day a man came home from work and told his wife, "Hon, I had the urge to put my thing in the pickle slicer."
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"Oh, my God, you should get some help!" his wife said. The next day he came home.
"Hon, I had that urge again!"
"That's it! After work tomorrow, I'm taking you to a doctor!"
The third day he came home all depressed and said, "Hon, I finally did it."
"WHAT HAPPENED?"
"They fired me - and the pickle slicer too."
think about it
What is the difference between a girl in a church and a girl in a bathtub?
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The girl in the church has a soul full of hope, and the girl in the bathtub...
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