Gross jokes

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Gross


vampires in a bar
 
 
Three vampires walk into a bar. The first one says, 'I'll have a pint of blood.'

The second one says, 'I'll have one, too.'

The third one says, 'I'll have a pint of plasma.'

The bartender says, 'So, that'll be two Bloods and a Blood Lite?'

pickle slicer
 
 
One day a man came home from work and told his wife, "Hon, I had the urge to put my thing in the pickle slicer."

"Oh, my God, you should get some help!" his wife said. The next day he came home.

"Hon, I had that urge again!"

"That's it! After work tomorrow, I'm taking you to a doctor!"

The third day he came home all depressed and said, "Hon, I finally did it."

"WHAT HAPPENED?"

"They fired me - and the pickle slicer too."

think about it
 
 
What is the difference between a girl in a church and a girl in a bathtub?

The girl in the church has a soul full of hope, and the girl in the bathtub...

happy birthdead to you
 
 
What do you buy a dead baby for its birthday?

A dead puppy!


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