Blonde jokes

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Blonde


backstroke dolly
 
 
What do you get when Dolly Parton does the backstroke?

Islands In The Stream.

two brunettes and a blonde...
 
 
Two brunettes and a blonde are attempting to fix a roof. While they are on the roof, a herd of cattle run by and knock down the ladder and leave a big pile of poop behind.

The two brunettes decide to make the blonde check how deep the poop is so they can jump down. So the blonde jumps down and yells, "It's only ankle deep."

So the two brunettes jump down and scream, "What are you talking about?! It's up to our heads!"

And the blonde replies, "Well, I jumped in head first."

a blonde wearing a headset walks into a salon
 
 
A blonde wearing a headset walks into a barbershop and says he wants his hair dyed brown.

The barber asks him to take off the headphones. The blonde refuses, but the barber dyes it anyway.

The blonde falls asleep so the barber takes the headphones off and continues dying his hair.

Two minutes later he's shocked to find the blonde is dead. The barber puts on the headphones and there's a voice repeating, "Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out."

blonde - elmo factory
 
 
Once there was a blonde who really needed some money. She saw an ad in the newspaper for a job at an Elmo factory. She went down and applied, but the manager told her that she wouldn't want the job because it was so boring. The blonde begged him and told him she would do anything because she needed the money really bad. After long consideration the manager hired her.

After a few hours the manager looked at the video-monitor showing the factory floor and saw that the conveyer belt was backed up. The manager went downstairs to find out what the problem was. When he arived there the blonde was sewing two marbles into the crotch of every Elmo.

The manager said, 'I said to give each Elmo two test tickles; not two testicles!'


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