Blonde jokes

A blonde had two horses, but she couldn't tell them apart. So she asked her neighbor for advice. He suggested that she cut the tail off one of the horses. This worked until the other horse snagged his tail on a fence. So the neighbor suggested notching one of the horses' ear. This worked until the other horse snagged his ear on a fence. So the neighbor suggested measuring the heights of the horses. And sure enough, the white horse was two inches taller than the black horse.

This blonde was walking down a road carrying a bag, when a guy came along.

The guy asks, 'What are you carrying?'

'Melons,' the blonde replies.

'Cool," the guy says. "If I can guess how many there are, can I have one of them?'

The blonde giggles and says, 'If you can guess how many there are, you can have BOTH of them.'

There were two blondes as roommates and they both bought mice. When they got home the first blonde said, "How are we going to tell them apart?"

The second blonde said, "Why don't we take one and chop off one of its legs?"

But during the night the mouse with four legs said to the mouse with three legs, 'That's not fair -- I want three legs too.' So the mouse with three legs told him to eat one of his legs. And so he did.

The next morning the blondes were upset about this so they did the same thing as the day before. But again the mouse with three legs ate one of his legs. This went on until both mice had no tails and legs. Then one of the blondes shouted, 'All right, that's it! You take the black one and I'll take the white one!'

A blonde came home from school one day and said to her mom, 'I can count higher then all the kids in my second grade class, do you think it is because I am a blonde?'

Her mother replied, 'Of couse it is, dear.'

The next day, the blonde said, 'I can say the alphabet higher then anyone in my class, do you think it is because I am a blonde?'

Her mother replied, 'Of course it is dear!'

The next day the blonde came home from her gymnastics and asked her mother, 'I have a larger chest then all the kids in my class, do you think its because I am a blonde?'

Her mother replied, 'No dear, I think it is because you are eighteen years old."