Blonde jokes

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Blonde


blonde on fire
 
 
A blonde's house was on fire. She called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please! My house is burning! Hurry!"

The operator said, "Okay, calm down and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"

The blonde answered, "Duh, in that big red truck!"

blonde's helicopter lessons
 
 
One day, a blonde went to go get lessons on how to fly a plane. The guy at the airport said there were no more plane flying lessons this year but she could take helicopter lessons. The blonde agreed and the man taught her and said, "I'll radio you every 1000 feet you go in the air." The blonde agreed.

He jumped in and took off. At 1000 feet, she radioed him and asked how she was doing. He said she was doing great. At 2000 feet, she radioed him and asked how she was doing. He said she was doing great. But right before she got to 3000 feet, the propeller stopped and she started twirling to the ground. When she landed, he went over to pull her out of the helicopter. He asked her what went wrong because she was doing perfect before. The blonde said, 'At 2500 feet, I started to get cold so I turned the big fan off.'

the perfect woman
 
 
Q: What is the definition of the perfect woman?

A: A deaf and dumb blonde nymphomaniac whose father owns a bar.

the blonde and the worm
 
 
Q: How does a blonde try to kill a worm?

A: Bury it alive!


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