Blonde jokes

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: 'I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!'

The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, 'You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!'

A blonde walks into an appliance store, and asks to buy a television set.

"Sorry," says the owner. "We don't allow blondes in here." The blonde leaves and dyes her hair brown. The next day, she returns and asks to buy the television.

"Sorry," says the owner. "We don't allow blondes in here."

"Hey," says the blonde, shocked, "how'd you know it was me?"

"You've been trying to buy a microwave."

How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

Wave!

A blonde had two horses, but she couldn't tell them apart. So she asked her neighbor for advice. He suggested that she cut the tail off one of the horses. This worked until the other horse snagged his tail on a fence. So the neighbor suggested notching one of the horses' ear. This worked until the other horse snagged his ear on a fence. So the neighbor suggested measuring the heights of the horses. And sure enough, the white horse was two inches taller than the black horse.