Sexuality jokes

After 24 hours, the priest calls the nuns back in and asks what they did. The first nun says, 'I had sex with two men at one time.'

The priest says, 'Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.' The second nun tells the priest, 'I robbed a bank for $25,000.'

The priest says, 'Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.'

The third nun tells the priest, 'I killed a woman that I have wanted dead all my life.'

The priest says, 'Quickly drink the holy water and God will forgive you.'

The priest said to the fourth nun, 'Okay, what sin did you commit.'

The fourth nun says, 'I pissed in the holy water.'

So every day the husband would get home at 5 o'clock, and every day they would go to bed at 5:15. In the door at 5, in the sack at 5:15. This went on for months, never missing a day until the wife came down with the flu and went to the doctor to get a flu shot.

The shot killed all the germs inside her except for three, and these three germs were huddled together inside her body talking over their survival plans.

One germ said, "I'm going to hide between two toes on her left foot, I don't think the antibiotics will find me there."

A second exclaimed, "I am going to hide behind her right ear, I don't think they'll find me there."

The last germ said, "I don't know about you guys, but when that 5:15 pulls out tonight, I'm gonna be on it!"

"Good evening, ladies," said Sherlock. After they passed, Watson asked if he knew those women.

"No, Watson, I didn't know that nun, prostitute, or bride." Baffled, Watson asks how he knew their identities.

"Elementary, my dear Watson. The nun was eating the banana by breaking it into small pieces. The prostitute was shoving the banana into her mouth. And the bride was holding the banana with one hand and forcing her head down with the other."