Sexuality jokes

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Sexuality


meat department
 
 
A man approaches a beautiful woman in a supermarket. "I've lost my girlfriend," he tells her. "Can you stand here and talk to me for a few minutes?" "Sure, but I don't understand how that would help," she replies. "Well, every time I talk to a woman with tits like yours, my girlfriend appears out of nowhere."
art gallery nudes
 
 
A couple goes to an art gallery. They find a picture of a naked women with only her privates covered with leaves. The wife doesn't like it and moves on but the huband keeps looking.

The wife asks, "What are you waiting for?"

The husband replies, "Autumn."

uncle tommy's closet
 
 
A guy comes home early one day from work. And he hears weird sounds coming from his bedroom. When he gets to his room, he finds his wife naked on the bed sweating bullets.

'What the hell is going on?' he says.

'I'm having a heart attack!!'

So he runs down stairs, and picks up the phone to dial 911. But as he is doing this, his four-year-old son, comes running up to him and says, 'Dad, Uncle Tommy is up stairs, hiding in your closet, and he's naked' So he slams the phone down, and runs upstairs, to find his own brother, in the closet.

The man, then says. 'What the hell are you doin? My wife is having a heart attack, and your here running around naked, scaring the kids? You shoud be ashamed of yourself!"

sex before communion
 
 
A concerned girl asked the priest, "Father, is it a sin to have sex before receiving communion?

He replied, "Only if you block the aisle."


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