"Hold on," says the martian, who slaps his face, which makes his penis grow longer with each snap. "Oops, it's not wide enough yet." He pulls his ears, and with each tug, his penis grows wider. "All set!" he says, and the martian and the woman have incredible, mind-blowing sex. Later, the woman meets up with her husband, and asks him how it was.
"Well, it was fine. But I have a headache now because she kept pulling my ears and slapping my face."
"Oh, my God, you should get some help!" his wife said. The next day he came home.
"Hon, I had that urge again!"
"That's it! After work tomorrow, I'm taking you to a doctor!"
The third day he came home all depressed and said, "Hon, I finally did it."
"WHAT HAPPENED?"
"They fired me - and the pickle slicer too."
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