Sexuality jokes

A group of students had a biology lab. As a part of this lab they were supposed to scrape some bacteria off their teeth with a toothpick and then examine it under the microscope.

But this one girl had some problems identifying her bacteria and asked the professor what they were.

"Those are sperm cells."

When Apollo Mission Astronaut Neil Armstrong first walked on the moon, he not only gave his famous "One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind," statement but followed it up with several remarks to the other astronauts and Mission Control.

Just before he re-entered the lander, however, he made the enigmatic remark, "Good luck Mr. Gorsky."

Many people at NASA thought it was a remark concerning some rival Soviet Cosmonaut.

However, upon checking, there was no Gorsky in either the Russian or American space programs. Over the years, many people questioned Armstrong as to what the "Good luck Mr. Gorsky" statement meant, but Armstrong always just smiled.

On July 5, 1995 in Tampa, Florida, while answering questions following a speech, a reporter brought up the 26-year-old question to Armstrong. This time he finally responded. Mr. Gorsky had finally died and so Neil Armstrong felt he could answer the question.

Armstrong explained, "When I was a kid, I was playing baseball with a friend in the backyard. My friend hit a fly ball that landed in the front of his neighbor's bedroom windows. My neighbors were Mr. & Mrs. Gorsky. As I leaned down to pick up the ball, I heard Mrs. Gorsky shouting at Mr. Gorsky, "Oral sex! You want oral sex?! You'll get oral sex when the kid next door walks on the moon!"

A man moved into a new apartment, and he decided to go and check his mail. The next thing he knows, a beautiful woman is standing in front of him and she has a robe on and she opens it and the man notices she has nothing on underneath. He tries to keep eye contact with the girl while she is talking to him. All of a sudden she says, “I hear someone coming, let's go in my apartment.
When they get in to her apartment, she lets her robe fall to the ground and asks the man, “Which part of my body do you like the best?” The guy replies, “Your ears.”
So she gets mad and asks, “Why my ears!? Look at this body! It's perfect! Look at these breasts -- they're real and they're mine! Look at this butt -- it's hard and firm! So why my ears?” The guy says, “Well, because the person you heard coming was me!”

10. Wanna come play on my slip and slide?

9. If you were a naval captain, would you let me inspect your seamen?

8. This bra is so tight its uncomfortable.

7. You must know a good rain dance, cuz you're making me wet.

6. Excuse me my lipstick rolled underneath your seat, mind if I get under you?

5. I was thinking of volunteering at the fire department, could I practice sliding down your pole?

4. How many licks does it take to get to the center of your tootsie pop?

3. Stick it in!!

2. Either I just spilled my drink in my lap or I'm really happy to see you.

1. Your face reminds me of a La-Z –Boy, I could sit on it all day long!