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His wife said, "Where are you going ?"
He said, "I'm going to the doctor."
And she said, "Why? Are you sick?"
"No," he said. "I'm going to get me some of those new Viagra pills."
So his wife got up out of her rocker and was putting on her sweater and he said, "Where are you going?"
She said, "I'm going to the doctor too."
He said, "Why?"
She said, "If you're going to start using that rusty old thing again, I'm going to get a tetanus shot."
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"You are both wrong," he says when he comes back up. "That's the best piece of ash I've ever had my pecker in."
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"I am to give you your wings so you can fly to heaven. But if you think one dirty thought or act out one dirty act your wings will fall off." So they fly to heaven without any trouble but when they get there the first guy sees a naked woman walk by so his wings falll off. When he bends over to pick them up the second guy's wings fall off.
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"5th and Main, please."
"You again?" says the taxi driver. "This is the 4th time I've dropped you and your wife off at work."
"Really? My wife doesn't work."
"Yes, she does. I drop her off there everyday, about an hour after I drive you to work."
"There?"
"Behind the Tillman & Lane department store."
"Interesting," says the man. "Tell you what. Pick me up in two hours, and I want you to show me where my wife works." So two hours later, the taxi arrives and takes the man to whorehouse behind Tillman & Lane.
"Hold on," said the driver. "I'll be right back."
There's a huge commotion after the driver goes in, with cursing and screaming and the sounds of breaking furniture. The driver comes out with a woman in a headlock.
"That's not my wife!" exclaims the man.
"I know. She's mine. I'm going back in for yours."
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