Sexuality jokes

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Sexuality


the confessional
 
 
A married man goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I almost had an affair with a woman."

The priest asks, "What do you mean, almost?"

"Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped."

The priest replies, "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to go near that woman again. Now, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box."

The man leaves confessional, says his prayers, and then walks over to the poor box. He pauses for a moment and then starts to leave.

The priest quickly runs over to him and says, "I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!"

"Well, Father, I rubbed up against it and you said it was the same as putting it in."

yo mama's so dumb
 
 
Yo mama's so dumb, she thought masturbation was a karate teacher.
airy sex
 
 
Q. Why is air a lot like sex?

A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.

elephant and man
 
 
What did the elephant say to the naked man?

'It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?'


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