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The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, 'If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.'
The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, 'What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?!'
The kid smiles and says, 'I would be a bus driver!'
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Not to be outdone, my other friend pulled out a $50 bill. She called the guy back over, licked the $50 bill and stuck it on his other butt cheek.
Now the attention was focused on me. What could I do to top that? I got out my wallet and thought for a minute. Then the banker in me took over. I got my ATM card, swiped it down his crack, grabbed the 60 bucks, and went home.
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The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful, and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion. He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and, until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.
Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms.
The girl started to laugh and reached over to hug her mother saying, "Oh Mom! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating a woman!"
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