biting
A man was in a bar all day and he had to use the bathroom. He was in there for a while, yelling, so the barmaid reluctantly went to the bathroom to check on him.
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"Sir, what are you yelling about? You're scaring the customers."
"Every time I try to flush the toilet something keeps biting my balls!"
"Sir, please get off the mop bucket."
would you marry again?
A husband and wife were lying in bed together one night. The wife rolled over and placed her hand lovingly on the chest of her husband.
"Honey," the wife said, "if I died would you get married again?"
The husband said, "Never, my dear."
The wife said, "I'm sure you would."
So the husband said, "Okay, I would"
"Would you let her sleep in our bed?" the wife asked.
And the husband replied, "I suppose so."
Then the wife asked, "Would you let her wear my clothes?"
"I doubt she'd want to," the husband said. "She'd be so much thinner."
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"Honey," the wife said, "if I died would you get married again?"
The husband said, "Never, my dear."
The wife said, "I'm sure you would."
So the husband said, "Okay, I would"
"Would you let her sleep in our bed?" the wife asked.
And the husband replied, "I suppose so."
Then the wife asked, "Would you let her wear my clothes?"
"I doubt she'd want to," the husband said. "She'd be so much thinner."
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