Sexuality jokes

As the lady tries it on, the furrier discreetly whispers to the man, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for $65,000." "No problem! I'll write you a check!" "Very good, sir." says the shop owner. "Today is Saturday. You may come by on Monday to pick it up, after your check has cleared."

So Sam and the woman leave. On Monday, the Morris returns. The store owner is outraged: "How dare you show your face in here? There wasn't a single penny in your checking account!"

"I just had to come by," grinned Sam, "to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!"

Accidents in the back of the car cause children.

'No, I want to show off my rosebuds!' she said and bounded out the door. The next day, the granddaughter came outside to find her grandmother on the porch wearing a see-through blouse without a bra.

'Grandmother! What are you doing? A couple of other friends are coming over any time now! Please go change your blouse, I'm so embarrassed!'

'No. If you can show off them rosebuds then I can show off my hanging baskets.'

Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie,
kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play,
they didnt know that Georgie was gay.

Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall, was he pushed,
or did he fall?
I pushed him.

Mary had a little lamb,
she tied it to a pilon.
1000 volts went up its arse,
and turned it in to nylon.

Baa baa black sheep,
have you any wool?
Yes sir yes sir,
two balls full.