Sexuality jokes

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Sexuality


mastercard for men
 
 
Cover charge: $15.00
Round of drinks: $23.00
Table dance: $30.00
Another round of drinks: $23.00
Couch dance and tips: $50.00
A round of shots: $34.00
Private dance in your hotel room: $300.00

Send her on her way and never have to hear her complain: priceless.

There are some things that money can't buy. For everything else, there's Mastercard.

mama mia, what's a honeymoon?
 
 
Two Italian virgins get married and go on their honeymoon. However, they have no idea what they're supposed to do once they get to their hotel room.

The newlyweds decide to call the groom's mother and get some advice on what to do. The mother says that they should sit on the bed together and snuggle with each other and things should start to happen from there. The newlyweds start to do this but nothing else happens.

The groom calls his mother back to find out what to do next. She says they should take their clothes off, get under the covers in bed and nature should takes its course. The bride and groom take his mother's advice but still nothing.

He calls his mother a third time. Getting frustrated with the situation she says, "Listen, just take the biggest thing you have and stick it in her hairiest thing!" and hangs up on him.

A few minutes later, he reluctantly calls his mother back, "Well, I have my nose in her armpit. What do I do next?"

silent bunny humping
 
 
Why don't rabbits make noise when they're making love?

Because they have cotton balls!

head room
 
 
Q: How do you give a blonde more head room?

A: Adjust the steering wheel.


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