Blonde jokes

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Blonde


breakfast of champions
 
 
Yo mama so stupid, she opened up a box of Cheerios and said, "Look, my Alphabet Soup spells 'Ooooo.'
elmo's redesign
 
 
A blonde is hired at the Tickle Me Elmo factory. The personnel manager explains her duties, and tells her to report to work promptly at 8:00 AM. The next day at 8:45AM, there's a knock at the personnel manager's door. The assembly line foreman comes in and starts ranting about this new employee. He says she's incredibly slow, and the whole line is backing up. The foreman takes the personnel manager down to the factory floor to show him the problem. Sure enough, Elmos are backed up all over the place. At the end of the line is the new employee. She has a roll of the material used for the Elmos and a big bag of marbles. They both watch as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles, and starts sewing the little package between Elmo's legs. The personnel manager starts laughing hysterically. After several minutes, he pulls himself together, walks over to the woman, and says, "I'm sorry, I guess you misunderstood me yesterday. Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles."
what's the difference between a blonde...
 
 
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board?

A: An ironing board's legs are hard to open

blonde driving
 
 
Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by the police?

A: Her headlights weren't working, so she was flashing people.


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