Sexuality jokes

Q: Why did the blonde have square boobs?

A: She forgot to take the tissues out of the box.

20) With chocolate size doesn't matter; it's always good.
19) When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake.
18) You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
17) You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle.
16) Good chocolate is easy to find.
15) You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
14) Chocolate doesn't make you pregnant.
13) With chocolate there's no need to fake it.
12) You don't get hairs in your mouth with chocolate.
11) You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.
10) You can have chocolate on top of your desk during working hours without upsetting your coworkers.
9) The word 'commitment' doesn't scare off chocolate.
8) Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names.
7) If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won't mind.
6) You can have chocolate in front of your mother.
5) You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to.
4) You can safely have chocolate while you are driving.
3) Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
2) 'If you love me you'll swallow that' has real meaning with chocolate.
1) You can get chocolate.

A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics. He asks her about it and she replies, "This is a very interesting book about sexual statistics. It identifies that American Indians have the longest average penis and Polish men have the biggest average diameter. By the way, my name is Jill. What's yours?"

He coolly replies, "Tonto Kowalski, nice to meet you."

A couple has returned from their honeymoon and it was obvious to everyone that they are not talking to each other. The groom's best man takes him aside and asks what's wrong.

"Well," replied the man "when we had finished making love on the first night, as I got up to go to the bathroom, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking."

"Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," said his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough - she can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years!"

The groom nodded gently and said, "I don't know if I can get over this though: She gave me $20 change!'