Blonde jokes

What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mental block.

One day in class, the teacher told everyone to turn to a blank sheet of paper in their notebooks. She noticed that Chip, the dumb jock, was having trouble with her directions.

"Have you found a blank piece yet, Chip?" said the teacher.

"Nope. I haven't," said the dumb jock. "Somebody went through and drew lines across all of the pages."

There was a woman who wanted to repaint her house, so she called the contractor and set an appointment to meet with him. When the contractor came to her house they did a walk-through and he asked her what colors she would like. They came to the living room and she told him that she would like a nice, warm cream color. The contractor wrote something down on his pad, then walked to the window and yelled, 'Greenside up.' The lady is a little confused, but doesn't say anything, and they continue to the dining room where she tells him, 'I would like a nice warm white in here, nothing stark.' The contractor writes something down on his pad, then walks to the window and again yells, 'Greenside up!' The lady is really confused now but still does not say anything. They continue to her bedroom and she says, 'I would like a nice, cool, relaxing blue in here.' The contractor writes something on his pad and again walks to the window and yells, 'Greenside up.' The woman is now totally perplexed and says to the contractor, 'Three times I have told you the color that I want, and you write something on your pad, then you walk to the window and yell greenside up. What is going on?' The contractor replies, 'You see, I have four blondes laying sod across the street.'

Britney Spears had just bought her new car and decided to go shopping with her friend and rival, Christina Aguilera. A few hours later she came out and realizes she had locked her keys in the car, so they spent a few hours pacing around the car trying to figure out what to do.

Finally, Britney looked off into the distance and saw storm cloud. She turned to her friend and said," Quick, think of something because a storm is coming and I left the top open!"