Sexuality jokes

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Sexuality


bubba hump
 
 
A football coach noticed that his star tackle, Bubba, had so many women hanging around that he couldn't possibly handle all of them. So one day he asked Bubba, "Just what the hell is your secret?" Bubba replied, "Well, coach, whenever I'm about to have sex, I always whip it out and bang it on the dresser like a hammer. That numbs it and I can screw 'em forever!" The coach went home early that day and went straight to the bedroom. He heard his wife in the shower and, seeing a window of opportunity, tore off his clothes and started banging his penis on the dresser. His wife immediately stuck her head out of the shower and said, "Is that you, Bubba?"
fascinating
 
 
A teacher asks her class of 3rd graders to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. She calls on a small boy sitting in the front row.

"I saw an airshow. And it was very fascinating."

"Good, but I wanted you to use the word 'fascinate,' not 'fascinating.'" She then calls on a girl sitting off to the left.

"I saw some monkeys. They were very fascinating."

"Good, but I wanted you to use the world 'fascinate,' not 'fascinating.'" Billy's hand shoots up into the air and she calls on him.

"Teacher, teacher! I got one!"

"Go ahead, Billy."

"My sister's shirt has ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fascinate."

baby talk
 
 
Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?"

"No," said his mom, "Of course not."

Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It's okay, we can play that game again!"

a small problem
 
 
A woman keeps asking her husband if her boobs are so small. 'Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?' she asks.

The next day her husband buys her a mirror. Before bed, she always looks in the mirror and asks her husband, 'Does this shirt make them look bigger? Does this one make them look smaller?'

Finally he gets so annoyed that he says, 'I know how to make them larger!'

'How!?!?!?' she asks.

'Take a bunch of toilet paper and rub it in between your boobs.'

'Well how long does it take?' she asks.

'They should expand over the years,' he answers.

'How did you know that?' she wonders.

'I dunno, but it sure worked for your ass, didn't it?'


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