Sexuality jokes

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Sexuality


ronald mcdonald in a nudist colony
 
 
How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony?

Look for sesame seed buns!

ex-girlfriend
 
 
A guy runs into his ex-girlfriend at a bar. "I had sex with another woman last night," he tells her. "But I was thinking of you the whole time." "You miss me that much?" she asks. "No," he says. "But it kept me from coming too fast."
pothead shopper
 
 
This pothead walks into a store and says to the clerk, ' How much for that TV in the window?'
And the clerk says, ' I don't sell to potheads.'
So the pothead says, ' I'll come back in a week and be sober.'
A week later he comes back and walks up to the clerk, 'How much for the TV in the window?'
The clerk says, 'I told you I don't sell to potheads!'
Then the pothead says, 'I'll come back in another week and I will be sober.'
The pothead comes back another week later and says to the store clerk, 'How much for the TV in the window?'
The clerk says, 'I'm not going to tell you again. I don't sell to potheads.'
The pothead says, 'How do you know if I am?'
And the store clerk goes, 'Because that isn't a TV in the window. It's a microwave.'
no arms, no chance
 
 
A women without arms or legs is sitting on a beach weeping. A guy walks by and asks her what's wrong. She says, "I've never been kissed before." The man feels sorry for her and gives her a long passionate kiss and starts to walk away. As he's walking he hears her start crying again so he goes back and asks her what's wrong now. She says, "I've never had sex before."

The man sweeps her up in his arms, looks into her eyes, and tosses her into the water yelling, "You're screwed now!!"


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