Animals jokes

Mrs. Andrews named her cat Love because it was so affectionate. One day, when Love failed to return home, Mrs. Andrews went out to look for her lost cat. Since she was wearing nothing but a bathrobe, a police officer stopped her and asked, “What are you doing?” Mrs. Andrews replied, “I was out here looking for Love.” The police officer arrested her on the spot.

In a recent issue of Meat & Poultry magazine, editors quoted from 'Feathers,' the publication of the California Poultry Industry Federation, telling the following story:
It seems the US Federal Aviation Administration has a unique device for testing the strength of windshields on airplanes. The device is a gun that launches a dead chicken at a plane's windshield at approximately the speed the airplane flies. The theory is that if the windshield can withstand the carcass test impact, it'll survive a real collision with a bird during flight.

Apparently, the British were very interested in this and wanted to test a windshield on a brand new, high-speed train they were developing.. They borrowed the FAA's chicken launcher, loaded a chicken and fired. The ballistic chicken not only shattered the windshield, but went through the engineer's seat, broke an instrument panel, and was imbedded in the back wall of the engine cab. The British were stunned and asked the FAA to review the test to see if everything was done correctly.

The FAA reviewed the data thoroughly and had one recommendation: 'Use a thawed chicken.'

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?

Answer: ell-if-i-no (Hell if I know)

How do you make a cat be a dog?

Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match. It will go 'WOOF.'