Animals jokes

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amishamed of myself
 
 
What do you call an Amish man on the side of the road, with his hand up a horse's ass?
A mechanic.
blonde nasa engineer
 
 
NASA sends a space shuttle up with two pigs and a blonde on board. While the shuttle is taking off, the NASA command center calls the first pig and asks, "Pig #1, do you know your mission?"

The pig replies, "Oink oink. Get the shuttle into orbit and launch the trillion dollar satellite. Oink oink."

Then NASA Control asks the second pig, "Pig #2, do you know your mission?"

The second pig replies, "Oink oink. Once Pig #1 has completed the trillion dollar satellite launch, close hatch, and go back to Earth. Land shuttle. Oink oink."

Then NASA asks the blonde, "Blonde woman, do you know your mission?"

The blonde woman replies, "Ummmmmmm.... Oh yeah, I remember now. 'Feed the pigs - and DON'T TOUCH A GODDAMNED THING!"

another chicken, another road
 
 
Q: Why did the stoner cross the road?

A: Who else would follow a chicken?

yo mama's...easy
 
 
Yo Mama is like a elephant, she rolls on her back for peanuts.

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