Animals jokes

Jokes » animals » jokes 106

Animals


rover the brick
 
 
A policeman is walking down the road when he sees a man with a brick tied to a dog leash. He decides to go and humor him. He walks up to the man and says, 'Hello, sir, I like your dog!'

The man looks at the brick, then the policeman, and says, 'It's not a dog, it's a brick.'

The policeman replies, 'Oh, sorry, I thought you were a bit mad,' and walks off rather puzzled.

As the policeman goes out of sight, the man turns to the brick and says, 'That fooled him, didn't it Rover?'

two of these things belong together
 
 
What's the odd one out? 1) A lobster 2) a whale 3) a guy that's been hit by a bus?

The whale -- the other two are both crustaceans.

genetic manipulation for good, not evil
 
 
What do you get when you cross a centipede with a turkey?
Drumsticks for everybody!
the christmas parrot
 
 
A guy walks into a store for some last-minute Christmas shopping, and sees a parrot for sale. He asks the clerk what the parrot's name is and the clerk tells him it's Chet. He also tells the man that this is one amazing parrot. If you put a match under his left foot, it sings “Jingle Bells,” and if you put a match under its left foot, it sings “Deck the Halls.”

The man thinks that is the coolest thing he's ever seen, so he decides to buy it for his wife. So he gets home, and puts it away. Then he wonders what will happen if he puts it a match between its legs, so he tries it, and the parrot starts singing “Chet's nuts roasting over an open fire...”


Page 107 of 155     «« Previous | Next »»