Animals jokes

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that's really, really nasty & practical
 
 
3 bums were outside a bar.The first one went in and asked for a fork.The second one went in and also asked for a fork. Then the third one went in and wanted a straw. At this point, the bartender became curious.

"How come all your friends want forks and you want a straw?"

"Well," the bum said, "the dog threw up and the chunks are all gone."

fox into bulldog
 
 
How do you turn a fox into a bulldog?

Marry her.

dead ant
 
 
Q:What did the elephant say when it saw a dead ant?
A: DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT.......
Q: What did the elephant say when it saw a live ant?
A: It stepped on the ant and then said DEAD ANT, DEAD ANT....
fly vs. mosquito
 
 
What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly?

A fly can fly but a mosquito cannot mosquito.


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