Animals jokes

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blonde test
If a rooster's on top of a barn door and lays an egg, does the egg fall on the north or the south side?

Roosters don't lay eggs, stupid!

regular toad and horny toad
What's the difference between a regular toad and a horny toad?

One says, 'Rib-it, rib-it,' while the other says, 'Rub-it, rub-it.'

you can't teach an old cat
What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten?

An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!

two blondes and two mice
There were two blondes as roommates and they both bought mice. When they got home the first blonde said, "How are we going to tell them apart?"

The second blonde said, "Why don't we take one and chop off one of its legs?"

But during the night the mouse with four legs said to the mouse with three legs, 'That's not fair -- I want three legs too.' So the mouse with three legs told him to eat one of his legs. And so he did.

The next morning the blondes were upset about this so they did the same thing as the day before. But again the mouse with three legs ate one of his legs. This went on until both mice had no tails and legs. Then one of the blondes shouted, 'All right, that's it! You take the black one and I'll take the white one!'

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