Animals jokes

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Animals


shaggy duck story
 
 
What did one duck say to the other?

What?

"Social Security!"

I don't get it.

You won't till you're 65...

cow or tractor
 
 
If a farmer was only able to choose between buying a cow or a tractor, what should he pick. On one hand, he would look funny riding on a cow. On the other hand, he would look funnier trying to milk a tractor.
guy with frog growing out of his head
 
 
A guy goes into a doctor's office with a frog growing out of his head.
"Tell me how it started," says the doctor.
"It started out as a bump on my ass," says the frog.
it's very difficult to marry princesses
 
 
Three men want to marry the king's most beautiful daughter. The king agrees to give them a chance, but they must perform three difficult tasks: defeat an ogre, turn lead to gold, and screw a cow. The first man dies fighting the ogre, the second fails at turning lead to gold, but the third man successfully completes all three tasks.
"Congratulations!" says the king. "You may now have my daughter's hand in marriage."
"Screw that," says the man. "I want the cow."

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