Animals jokes

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proverbs
 
 
'Passionate kiss, like spider's web, soon lead to undoing of fly.'
'Virginity like bubble. One prick, all gone!'
'Man who run behind car get exhausted'
'Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day'
'Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man give wife upright organ.'
'Man who walk thru airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok'
'Man with one chopstick go hungry.'
'Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.'
'Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.'
'Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk!'
'Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.'
'War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.'
'Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.'
'Man who sleep in cathouse by day, sleep in doghouse by night.'
'Man who fight with wife all day, get no piece at night!'
'Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out!'
'It takes many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.'
'Man who drive like hell, bound to get there!'
'Man who sit on tack get point!'
'Man who stand on toilet is high on pot!'
'Man who lives in glass house should change in basement.'
'He who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.'
'Man who farts in church sits in own pew.'
'Man who jumps from tall building, jumps to conclusion'.
'Crowded elevator smells different to midget."
every party needs a pooper
 
 
Why did the elephant bring toilet paper to a party?
Becase he was a party pooper.
snakeskin punny
 
 
What kind of condoms do snakes use?

Anacondoms!

four worms and a funeral
 
 
Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol. The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a jar of sperm. The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day:

First worm - dead

Second worm - dead.

Third worm - dead.

Fourth worm - alive.

Lesson: As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won't get worms!


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