Animals jokes

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bigfoot and blonde
What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?

Maybe someday we'll find Bigfoot.

doggie no legs
Q: What do you call a dog with no legs?

A: It doesn't matter, he's not going to come anyway.

turtle soup
A waitress walks up to a man to take his order.

"I'd like to get the turtle soup, please." The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead.

"Hold the turtle, make it pea!"

two brunettes and a blonde...
Two brunettes and a blonde are attempting to fix a roof. While they are on the roof, a herd of cattle run by and knock down the ladder and leave a big pile of poop behind.

The two brunettes decide to make the blonde check how deep the poop is so they can jump down. So the blonde jumps down and yells, "It's only ankle deep."

So the two brunettes jump down and scream, "What are you talking about?! It's up to our heads!"

And the blonde replies, "Well, I jumped in head first."

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