Animals jokes

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late again
 
 
A kid was late for school one day.

"I had to take the bull down to mate with the heifer," he explained to the teacher.

"Couldn't your father have done that?"

"Sure, but the bull would have done a better job."

bar... grasshopper
 
 
A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, 'Hey, we have a drink named after you!'

The grasshopper looks surprised and says, 'You have a drink named Steve?'

three nuns and a parrot
 
 
Three nuns used to go to the church from their homes every day. On the way they would pass a house where a parrot lived. The parrot would call out three colors every time the nuns would pass by. They soon realized that the parrot was calling out the colors of their respective underpants. They tried to fool the parrot by switching positions while walking and even wearing different colored underpants every day, but the parrot was never wrong. Finally they devised a way to fool the parrot by not wearing any underpants at all. When they walked across the house the parrot spoke out loud, 'Straight, straight, curly.'
ducks or plucks?
 
 
Q: What did did the mother duck say to the little duck.
A: If you don't behave, I'm gonna quack you one.

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