Animals jokes

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when beasts speak!
What did the cat say to the mouse?

"The human telling this joke is attempting to anthropomorphise us!"

snail heads for the daytona tracks
There was this snail who wanted to be a Formula One racing driver. He went along to the track and asked if he could drive. The racing team manager said, "Yes, but you can't have a number on your car, you can only have an 'S' because you are a snail."

The Snail was okay with this is so he entered the race. The race started and the snail's car was at the back...but suddenly he sped to the front, over-taking all the cars and won!!

As the spectators saw the Snail speed past them, they yelled "WOW! LOOK AT THAT S-CAR GO!"

what came first...
Q: Why does a chicken lay eggs?

A: Because if she dropped them, they'd break.

a ton of pinching?
What weighs 2,000 pounds and pinches?

An elephant wearing a tight tuxedo!

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