Animals jokes

What does a cat like to eat on a hot summer's day?
A mice cream cone!

What's the difference between an old cat and a baby kitten?

An old cat scratches and bites but a little pussy never hurt anybody!

A snail owned a car and was painting a big letter 'S' on it. His friend the turtle saw him and asked why and the snail replied, "When people see me drive by they can, 'Say look at the S-car-go".

A man calls the Animal Control in his town, because there is a crazed gorilla on his roof, and he can't figure out how to get it down safely. Soon, a van pulls up, and an old man gets out, carrying a small dog, a baseball bat, and a gun. He hands the man the gun.

"Okay, here's what we do. I'm going to go up onto your roof, and threaten the gorilla with this baseball bat until he falls down. When he falls down, this little dog will bite him in the balls until he's incapacitated."

"Great," says the man. "But what's the gun for?"

"In case I fall down instead of the gorilla -- shoot the dog."