Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


hair spray: can you dig it?
 
 
A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put back in that little hole." The little boy runs into the house and comes back out with a can of hair spray. He sprays the worm until it is straight and stiff as a board. Then he stuffs the worm back into the hole. The grandfather hands the little boy five dollars, grabs the hair spray and runs into the house. Thirty minutes later, the grandfather comes back out and hands the little boy another five dollars. The little boy says, "Grandpa, you already gave me five dollars." The grandfather replies, "I know. That's from your grandma."
field of dreams?
 
 
A farmer's crop was ruined for the year and he was having no luck at all. Then he heard a voice, 'If you build it they will come.' He thought nothing of it at first but then he heard it again, 'If you build it they will come.' So the farmer thought and thought, prayed and prayed, until finally, he knew what to do. A few months later he completed construction of his new strip club!
brain transplant
 
 
A patient needed a brain transplant and the doctor told the family, 'Brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves.'

'Well, how much does a brain cost?' asked the relatives.

'For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000,' replied the doctor.

Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded because they thought they understood. But the patient's daughter was unsatisfied and asked, 'Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?'

'Standard pricing practice,' said the doctor. 'Women's brains have to be marked down because they've actually been used.'

loss of intelligence
 
 
What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her intelligence?

Divorced!


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