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The old man often screamed these words at her in public, "I'm sick and tired of you! When I die, I will come out of my grave to haunt you!"
The old guy started practicing black magic. All the disappearances in the neighborhood of cats, dogs and people were blamed on him.
At the age of 80 the old guy died, and his wife put him in a casket. Later that night, she went to a bar and partied as if there was no tomorrow. Her neighbor asked her, "Aren't you scared that the old guy will dig up and haunt you?"
The old lady calmly replied, "Eh, let him keep digging. I put the casket in the other way around."
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The befeathered fellow at the gates takes Arthur to the Throne Room and introduces him to God. Arthur then asks God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of Woman?" God says, "Ah, yes." "Well," says Davidson, "You have some major design flaws in your invention: One, there's too much front-end protrusion Two, it chatters at high speeds. Three, the rear end wobbles too much. Four, the intake is placed too close to the exhaust."
"Hmmm..." replies God, "hold on." God goes to the Celestial Supercomputer, types in a few keystrokes, and waits for the result. The computer prints out a slip of paper and God reads it. "It may be that my invention is flawed," God tells Arthur Davidson, "but according to My Computer, more people are riding my invention than yours."
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