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"Well," replied the man "when we had finished making love on the first night, as I got up to go to the bathroom, I put a $50 bill on the pillow without thinking."
"Oh, you shouldn't worry about that too much," said his friend. "I'm sure your wife will get over it soon enough - she can't expect you to have been saving yourself all these years!"
The groom nodded gently and said, "I don't know if I can get over this though: She gave me $20 change!'
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In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer.
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"Son, I won't tell you the dictionary definition in fear that it will confuse you. But to help you out, I'll give you something to do. Go ask your mother if she will sleep with a bum for $500,000 and ask your sister is she'll sleep with the garbageman for the same amount." So, the little boy goes up to his mom.
"Mommy, would you ever sleep with a bum for $500,000?"
"You bet your ass I would!" exclaims the mother. So the little boy goes up to his sister's bedroom.
"Hey sis, would you sleep with the garbageman for $500,000?"
"I sure would!" exclaims his sister.
"Dad, Dad! Mom and sis both said they would. What does that mean?"
"Well, son," the father says. "Technically, we're millionares but in reality we live with a couple of dirty whores!"
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"What dear?" She asked gently.
"I think you bring me bad luck."
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