Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


marriage blues
 
 
Once a man saw a board outside his friend's office and it said 'B.A.' next to his name, but after a week it said 'M.A.'

So he asked his friend how he got his master's degree so quickly. The friend replied that last week his wife died so he put on the board B.A. [bachelor again]. But then he married once more so he put on the board M.A. [married again].

ladies laugh last
 
 
1. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon - they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well - they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men - most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something - suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind - but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man - look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal.

three kinds of...
 
 
There are three kinds of rings: the engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffeRing.
octogenarian barroom chat
 
 
Two old people hit it off at a singles bar. After a few drinks the woman says to the man, 'If we went out for a meal, where would you take me?'
He replied, 'Chinese.'
She asked,' What would you order?'
He replied, 'Moo Goo Gai Pan.'
She asked, ' If we went out for a full night of dining, dancing and carousing, what would you wear?'
He replied, 'Depends....'
She asked, 'Depends on what?'
He replied, 'Just DEPENDS....'

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