bill and hillary
Bill Clinton and Senator Hillary Clinton were at a Yankees game. Before the game began a secret service man came up to him and whispered in his ear.
Bill Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field.
The secret service man came running up to him and said, "Mr. President Sir, I think you misunderstood me, I said throw out the first pitch."
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mother-in-law
A man's house is on fire. He runs out of the house with his son and tells him to wait outside. Then he runs back in and gets his daughter and brings her outside. Then his wife. Then the dog. Then he goes back in a couple of times without bringing out anybody.
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So a fireman asks him, "Why are you going back in there?"
The man replies, "I'm turning over my mother-in-law."
sex over-easy
These two eggs had just been married and were on their honeymoon.
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While they were sitting on the bed making out, the female egg pushed the male egg away and said, "I just have to go to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute." and off she went.
Five minutes later, the male egg saw his sexy wife walk out in a slinky egglige, wiping her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body.
Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely.
The female egg looked at him and asked what he was doing.
He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon!"
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