Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


smoking at gas station
 
 
This lady was at the gas station pumping gas and smoking a cigarette when her arm caught fire.

When the police arrived they shot her for waving a firearm.
guardian angel
 
 
A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice: 'Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.'

The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after awhile he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: 'Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die.'

The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. 'Where are you?' the man asked. 'Who are you?'

'I am your guardian angel,' the voice answered.

'Oh yeah?' the man asked... 'And where the hell were you when I got married?'

high sperm count
 
 
How do you tell if your boyfriend has a high sperm count?

If you have to chew before you swallow.

ex-lax, don't do it
 
 
Why are men like laxatives?

Because they irritate the crap out of you!


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