Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


5 counterproductive pick-up lines
 
 
1) If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole.
2) How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized?
3) My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can't hold it in.
4) If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, then could I meet you between the holidays?
5) How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.
female hormones in beer
 
 
Two men were in a pub.

One man said, "Did you know that beer contains female hormones?"

The other man said, "No! Is it true?"

"Yes," said the first man. "If you drink too much, you start talking crap and you drive terribly."

man and pig?
 
 
Q: What's the difference between a man and a pig?
A: You mean there IS a difference?
efficiency expert
 
 
The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. 'You don't want to try these techniques at home.'

'Why not?' asked someone from the back of the audience. 'I watched my wife's routine at breakfast for years,' the expert explained.

'She made lots of trips to the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying just a single item at a time. 'Hon,' I suggested, 'Why don't you try carrying several things at once?'

The voice from the back asked, 'Did it save time?'

The expert replied, 'Actually, yes. It used to take her 20 minutes to get breakfast ready. Now I do it in seven.'


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