Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


take off my clothes
 
 
My wife came home the other night and told me to take off her blouse.

Then she told me to take off her skirt.

Then she told me not to wear her clothes anymore.
bride and broom
 
 
Two brooms were going to get married, before the ceromony, the bride broom said to the groom broom, "I think I'm going to have a whisk broom."

The groom broom said to the bride broom, "How can that be possible? we haven't even swept together!"'

5 counterproductive pick-up lines
 
 
1) If you and I were squirrels, I could bust a nut in your hole.
2) How do you like your eggs: fried, scrambled or fertilized?
3) My love for you is like diarrhea; I just can't hold it in.
4) If your right leg was Thanksgiving, and your left leg was Christmas, then could I meet you between the holidays?
5) How about we play lion and lion tamer? You hold your mouth open, and I'll give you the meat.
cinderella gets some ash
 
 
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears,and promises to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on two conditions.

'First, you must wear a diaphragm. But if you're not home by 2 AM, your diaphragm will turn into a pumpkin.' Cinderella agrees, but she doesn't roll in until five in the morning, looking love-struck and very satisfied.

'Where have you been?' demands the fairy godmother. 'Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!'

'I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything.'

'I know of no prince with that kind of power! Tell me his name!'

'I can't remember, exactly. It was Peter, Peter, something or other...'


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