Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


the answer
 
 
A chicken and an egg are lying in bed when the chicken takes out a cigarette and begins to smoke. The egg, pissed off, takes one look at the chicken, rolls over and pulls the blanket over him and says, "I guess we answered that question!"
two twenties
 
 
A drunk in a bar barfs all over his own shirt. "Damn," he says. "I puked on my shirt again. If the wife finds out, she's gonna kill me." "Not to worry," says the bartender as he sticks a $20 bill in the drunk's pocket. "Just tell her someone puked on you and gave you some cash to cover the cleaning bill." So the drunk goes home and tells his wife about the guy who puked on him. She reaches into his pocket and finds two twenties. "Why are there two twenties?" she asks. The drunk replies, "Oh, yeah, he crapped in my pants, too."
squeaky clean
 
 
One night a man rolls over in bed and gives his wife a big grin.
She says, 'Not tonight honey, I have a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay clean and fresh.'
The man feeling rejected rolls over and tries to go to sleep.
In a few minutes he rolls back over and asks his wife, 'Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow?'
cherry pop
 
 
Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.

"I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause 7 days a week he's up."

"I want mine to be Mountain Dew 'cause when he's in between my mountains, we'll be doing it."

"Mine's gonna be Jack Daniel's."

"You can't do that. Here we are talking about soda pop and you're talking about a hard liquor."

"Exactly."


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