Men And Women jokes

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Men And Women


husband & wife
 
 
Scene: Suburban home, living room. Post-quarrel.
Wife: You know, I was a fool when I married.
Husband: Yes, dear. But I was in love and didn't notice.
before it starts
 
 
A man comes home from work and sits in his recliner in front of the television.
"Hey, wife!" he yells. "Gimme a beer before it starts!" She gives him his beer. Fifteen minutes pass.
"Hey, wife!" he yells. "Gimme a beer before it starts!" She gives him his beer. Five minutes pass.
"Hey, wife!" he yells. "Gimme a beer before it starts!"
"Hey, you've already had two beers in twenty minutes! Don't you think that's a lot? I'm not getting you another!"
"Now it starts."
futurama
 
 
How does a man plan for the future? He buys TWO cases of beer.
respecting the first lady
 
 
George W. Bush walks into a restaurant in Washington DC with his wife Laura. The waiter approaches the table and asks for his order.

'I'll have your biggest, juiciest London Broil,' answers the President.

'But sir, what about the mad cow?!!' asks the waiter.

'Oh,' answers Dubya, 'she'll order for herself.'


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