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the law of the jungle
 
 
Two guys were hiking through the jungle when they spotted a tiger who looked both hungry and fast. One of the guys reached into his pack and pulled out a pair of Nikes. His friend looked at him.

'Do you really think those shoes are going to make you run faster than that tiger?'

'I don't have to run faster than that tiger,' his friend replied. 'I just have to run faster than you.'

yo mama's a saint
 
 
Yo' mama a saint...a St. Bernard!
ten cows in your basement
 
 
Q: How do you get ten fat cows in your basement?

A: Hold a tupperware party!

turtle crossing
 
 
Why did the turtle Cross the road?

To get to the 'Shell' station!


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