Animals jokes

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who dun it?
 
 
You know you're a redneck if your dog farts and you take the credit.
jesus & the robber
 
 
One night a robber broke into a home and heard a voice say, 'Jesus is watching you!'while he rumagged through the desk. He replied, 'Who said that?!' Once again he heard the same thing, 'Jesus is watching you!'

The robber looked around the room only to see a parrot. He asked the parrot what its name was. The parrot replied, 'Cornelius.' The robber said, 'What kind of a name is that?! Who names a parrot that?!' The parrot said, 'The same person who named that rottweiler behind you Jesus!'

one-eyed blonde
 
 
Two blondes are walking down the road when one says 'Look at that dog with one eye!'

The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says 'Where?'

elephant and man
 
 
What did the elephant say to the naked man?

'It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?'


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